One Shot
by DreamscomeTRUEEE
Summary: Natsu had only one shot. And he didn't treasure it. - "When Natsu saw Gray pushed up against the wall, making out with Lyon, he felt something deep within him break into a trillion tiny pieces. Why? He had never loved Gray, so why? Why did Gray's betrayal hurt so much when Natsu had been the one to cheat in the first place?" YAOI.
1. Prologue

**One shot**

_**Disclaimer : I do not own Fairy Tail nor do I profit from writing FanFiction.**_

_**Pairings : Natsu/Gray (main), NaLu, LoLu, LyoRay**_

_**Rating : M for future lemons **_

_**Warnings : Yaoi, Shounen Ai, BL, whatever you call it. If you are triggered or disturbed by images of two guys kissing, I apologize and suggest you leave.**_

**_Natsu x Gray, established relationship. Unbeta-ed. Mulitichaptered._**

* * *

_**Prologue**_

"Shitty flame!" Gray grinned widely, making his way towards the table Natsu and Lucy were seated at.

"What, pervy exhibitionist?" Natsu returned the grin with one of his own.

"I finally found a buyer! He was a total creep, but he bought my house by a high price so I don't care." Gray continued gleefully, "I never expected to profit that much."

Natsu frowned upon hearing that. "A creep? You're letting a creep live in the house you once lived, bathed and slept in?"

"Yup, so what? I mean," Gray sat down between the two and slung his arm over Natsu's shoulders, "I'm moving in with you, aren't I?"

Natsu immediately brightened, "Guess so!" Then he yanked Gray's head over and kissed him hard. Pulling away, he smirked at Gray's flushed cheeks. "Think of all the possibilities ~"

Lucy groaned loudly. "Aww, can you guys tone it down a little? Sure it was kinda cute in the beginning but now, seeing you guys in lovey-dovey mood 24/7 is really annoying."

Gray leaned in towards Lucy and teased, "Jealous, Blondie?"

The celestial spirit Mage pouted, "Maybe."

Visibly surprised, Natsu inquired, "Why? Aren't you dating the world's most hopeless romantic, Loke?"

Lucy stared at the ground, looking downcast. "Not anymore."

"Wait what? You guys broke up? You're like perfect for each other, that's stupid!" Gray exclaimed. "Does that horny lion need some ass-kicking?"

Lucy replied forlornly, "It's not his fault. It's me."

"You? How come?"

"We would never have worked out. He doesn't have what I'm searching for in a man, I guess."

"_Loke_ doesn't? He's the most desired man of Fiore, just how high are your requirements?" Gray looked honestly perplexed. "I still think it's silly, I've never seen Loke happier than the day he announced that the two of you were going out."

Lucy shrugged sadly, "I think I really do love him, but dating a celestial spirit just saps the energy from me, it's really taxing. I suppose I just don't love him enough."

"So... In your opinion, love isn't the most primary aspect of a romantic relationship?" Gray asked. "I don't understand." He turned to his boyfriend, "I don't suppose you do either, you stupid head of pink hair."

Natsu did not reply. He simply stared at Lucy, too stunned to move.

"Natsu?" Worried, Gray shook him softly. "Earth to Natsu? Do you copy?"

Finally snapping out of it, the dragon slayer opened his mouth, but he couldn't find any words to say. He swallowed, and found his voice at last. He directed his eyes towards Lucy, hoping to convey the things he wasn't able to voice out loud. "I'm... We're with you, Lucy."

Lucy looked at him and smiled sincerely, "Thank you."

Gray stood up then, "Well, I'm not going to stay around and gossip, I still have matters to attend to, what with the property selling and all. I won't be back until nightfall. See you. Love you, Natsu."

Hearing the last sentence, Natsu recoiled, looking like he had just been hit with a ton of bricks. "Ye... Yeah. Love you too, Gray."

When the ice mage's footsteps faded and his figure disappeared out of sight, Lucy pulled her seat closer to Natsu's.

She flicked her tongue, moistening her lips. Natsu's eyes followed her every movement.

Then she leaned in and reached out, placing her hand on Natsu's and caressing his hand gently. "I sincerely hope that I didn't misinterpret that look you gave me, Natsu. And well, since you're not pulling away, I guess my hunch was correct."

Lucy bit her lip. "Please understand that this is making me feel really bad, I don't want to hurt Gray. But..."

At the mention of Gray's name, Natsu stiffened. Then he made a quick and rash decision. He silenced Lucy with a kiss, his lips molding over hers.

Natsu was in heaven inside. Just how long had he waited for this, for the feeling of Lucy in his arms, her scent, her soft skin, and just her in general. How long had he harbored this unrequited love.

When their lips parted, Natsu tightened his hold on Lucy's hand. "Gray won't be home until the night. Come with me."

* * *

**_Please drop me a review, even if it's just a smiley face, it'll mean the world to me. _**

**_-Dreams_**


	2. Chapter 1 - Downfall

_**Disclaimer : I do not own Fairy Tail nor do I profit from writing FanFiction.**_

_**Pairings : Natsu/Gray (main), NaLu, LyoRay, LoLu (so minor you won't even notice it)**_

_**Rating : M for smut.**_

_**Warnings : Yaoi, Shounen Ai, BL, whatever you call it. If you are triggered or disturbed by images of two guys kissing, I apologize and suggest you leave.**_

**_Natsu x Gray, established relationship. Unbeta-ed. Multi-chaptered._**

* * *

_**Chapter 1 - Downfall**_

Gray yawned loudly and stretched as he dragged his feet across the pavement, on his way home.

_Home_. He liked the way it sounded.

When he reached the familiar door, his heartbeat started to increase. This would be the first time he entered this house, this home he shared with his adorable but idiot of a boyfriend with a different identity. This was also the day that marked the twelfth month they started dating. Today was special.

"I'm home", he whispered.

He stepped inside quietly, not wanting to wake his lover. Making his way up the stairs, he took special care to not step on the ones that creaked. Honestly, it surprised him how he knew the insides of Natsu's house like the back of his hand. Exhausted, he pulled off his shirt and prepared to get in the shower.

At the sight of the unwashed bed sheets crumpled on the washroom floor, he frowned. He really should start teaching Natsu to be neat, it wouldn't do if Gray did all the housework. Not that Gray didn't do them for him before he moved in, but still. Shaking his head in disapproval, he leaned down and picked the bed sheets up.

_This smell._

His eyes widened. How did he not notice the stench the moment he stepped inside?

The sheets stunk of sex.

More accurately, it stunk of semen. Natsu's dried semen. A smell that Gray was all too familiar with.

His heart began to run a marathon, but he relaxed almost immediately. How ridiculous. As if Natsu would cheat on him and not have the sense to wash the bed sheets, leaving it out in the open for him to notice. Scratch that, Natsu would never cheat on him either way, he was too loyal a person.

Yes, Natsu must have gotten horny and masturbated on the bed, that's all.

That was all.

Having convinced and reassured himself,he showered and headed to his place on the bed - on Natsu's right side.

As he got under the covers, he heard Natsu mumbling incoherently. He chuckled, sleep talking had always been a trait of his. A trait that, like everything else about him, Gray fell in love with.

"Laff..." Gray strained his ears, what did he say? Natsu spoke again, this time more clearly, and Gray actually laughed out loud.

"Love... Love you..."

That bastard, who gave him the permission to be so cute? Gray could feel his ears reddening, but he felt so happy. When Natsu had accepted his confession exactly a year before, Gray had felt in bliss but at the same time, insecure. Since then, he had always wondered if Natsu only did so out of pity. Natsu had never showed any signs that he loved him before, after all.

What a pleasant surprise. Turns out all his worries were over nothing. Natsu loved him. Natsu had been the one to suggest he sell his house and move in. Natsu always remembered to tell him that he loved him, every day, without fail. Come to think of it, this must mean that Natsu knew he was insecure, how pathetic.

Gray gently stroked Natsu's hair, smiling. Only when Natsu was asleep or unconscious did Gray allow himself to act like this. He didn't want Natsu to know that he was utterly under his spell. The idiot would only use it to his advantage and ask for stuff when Gray didn't want to.

This idiot was his. This idiot loved him. Enough to profess his love in his dreams.

Suddenly Natsu's lips moved, and Gray stared at them, wanting to make out the words.

"Love you... So much..."

That was it. He didn't care if he woke him, Gray was going to give him the kiss of his life. He placed his hand on Natsu's cheek and leaned in.

But before he could do so, two last syllables were uttered in a loving tone.

A name.

Gray's name did not have two syllables.

* * *

The next morning, Natsu opened his eyes, feeling charged. Today was the day he would finally be together with the one he loved with all his heart. The one he had fallen in love with at the first sight. The one so beautiful everybody else paled in comparison.

Finally. Finally, she was single.

Whistling a joyful tune, he hopped out of bed, had a rushed breakfast and headed to the guild.

He didn't notice the lack of warmth beside him. He forgot.

"Lucy!" He shouted loudly, unable to keep the excitement from his voice. "I have something to tell you!"

Lucy stood up. "So have I. Just the two of us, okay?"

Natsu nodded and followed her out the guild door. Once alone, he pulled Lucy into an embrace.

"I missed you."

Lucy's body was rigid. She pushed him away, her expression serious.

"Natsu. Yesterday was a one-time-only fling. I needed to be with someone and you were there, you wanted me. There was nothing else to it. Don't misunderstand."

"You...You're lying." Natsu shook his head in denial.

"No, I'm not. I'm sorry, but I don't love you like that, Natsu." Her eyes softened. "Plus, you have Gray, remember? Gray's my nakama, I can't do this to him."

"Who cares about Gray?" Natsu blurted, not thinking straight. The words "don't love you" were resonating in his head like a bad dream. He wanted to wake up. "He's a big boy, he can deal with it. But Lucy, I..." In tears, he choked out, "I love you, Lucy. I have for a very long time."

Lucy smiled sadly. "I'm sorry," she repeated softly. And she turned, leaving him heartbroken and alone.

Natsu broke down then. He whimpered, tears streaming down his face. He knew that he was eternally internally broken. But he needed to be strong. If Lucy didn't love him, there was nothing he could do. He couldn't force her to date him, he loved her too much to make her unhappy. Thus he picked up the remnants of his heart and pasted them together clumsily.

Wiping away his tears, he re-entered the guild hall.

Unbeknownst to him, Gray was broken beyond repair behind him. Gray couldn't feel himself. He couldn't even cry. He felt that he was frozen rigid, and he wanted to escape like this. He didn't want to face the cruel reality.

_"Who cares about Gray?" _

He wrapped his arms around himself, shivering.

_"He's a big boy, he can deal with it." _

"Is that so?" He whispered.

That was their first anniversary. Simultaneously, the day that marked the eventual doom of their relationship.

* * *

Natsu searched for black hair and pale skin. He desperately needed a source of comfort. He knew that Gray would never leave him.

The moment he saw the figure huddled in a corner, he hurried over, immensely relieved.  
When he noticed that Gray was unhealthily pale, his heart clenched with worry for a split second but he ignored it. Gray's problems could be dealt with later. He was sure that Gray would forgive his inconsideration. Because Gray always did.

"Gray, where were you?" He asked accusingly. "I've been looking all over for you."

_So you noticed that I wasn't beside you when you woke up._ Oddly, Gray felt just a bit better.

"I... noticed something. Natsu, I think we..."

Natsu cut him off. "Let's fuck."

Gray's eyes widened. "What?"

"Now. Please. I'm begging you, Gray."

Gray clenched his fist tightly. "I'm tired."

"It's too early to be tired. Please Gray, I need this. You're the only one that can do this for me."

"Fine." Gray paused. "But if we're fucking, we're fucking here."

"Here? What the hell, Gray?"

Gray took a deep breath and stood up. He wrapped his arms around Natsu and whispered in his ear, "Yes, right here, right now. Fuck me. Mark me for the world to see. Let everyone know that I am yours."

He withdrew. "I will always be yours." Then his eyes darkened for a second, "Even if you do not belong to me."

Natsu paid no heed to the last sentence. "You want it now? In the guild? In front of everyone?" He grinned. "Then don't complain when everyone sees you moaning like a bitch in heat."

With an animalistic growl, the dragon slayer tackled the ice Mage to the floor.

_You finally smiled_. _Did Lucy's rejection affect you to that extent?_

Natsu skipped foreplay, simply ridding them both of their clothing at high-speed and spreading Gray's legs as wide as they could go.

Gray could hear the uncomfortable exclaims of the guild members around them, but he ignored them. Soon, he heard shuffling of footsteps leaving the guild, the people complaining all the way. He didn't care. He wouldn't even care if they stayed and watched.

When Natsu plunged deep inside him at one go, Gray could feel nothing but pain. Despite so, he urged his lover to go faster, deeper.

Gray etched the pain into his memory.

The pain slowly faded into pleasure. And Gray could do nothing but howl Natsu's name to the high heavens as he was fucked hard and raw.

Their climaxes came fast. Gray shut his eyes and did his best to remember the feeling of Natsu's come filling his insides. _This would be the last time._

Then Natsu pulled out and collapsed on top of him. A gentle hand lifted his chin.

"Why... Are you crying, Gray?" Natsu panted. "Was I too rough?"

_He cares. He cares he cares he cares_.

Gray buried his face into Natsu's chest.

"I'm sorry."

Confused, Natsu asked, "What? Why?"

"I can't."

Gray let his tears flow as proof of his failure.

_I just can't. I can't let you go._

* * *

_**I'm sorry if the characters appear too OOC. It was necessary and will be explained in future chapters. Please leave a review! ;)**_

_**-Dreams**_


	3. Chapter 2 - Breaking Point

_**Disclaimer : I do not own Fairy Tail nor do I profit from writing FanFiction.**_

_**Pairings : Natsu/Gray (main), NaLu, LyoRay, LoLu (so minor you won't even notice it)**_

_**Rating : M for smut.**_

_**Warnings : Yaoi, Shounen Ai, BL, whatever you call it. If you are triggered or disturbed by images of two guys kissing, I apologize and suggest you leave.**_

**_Natsu x Gray, established relationship. Unbeta-ed. Multi-chaptered._**

* * *

**_Chapter 2 - Breaking Point_**

It was killing him. Twisting a knife slowly and agonizingly long after the initial stab, cruelly pouring salt onto the gaping wound.

It was murdering his pride, and his whole being.

But still he stayed. Because to have his beloved by his side, there was no other path to walk on.

So even as he was sliced with rejection and scorched by the obvious lies, he did nothing but hold up his icy shield, separating himself from the truth.

Yes, he supposed he was what could be called a 'coward.'

* * *

"Flame Br-" Gray didn't know why, but the term of endearment was unable to make it past his lips. It hurt too much. "Natsu."

"Yeah?"

"Can you take out the trash for me? I'm exhausted."

"Sure."

Gray chewed on his bottom lip. This was it. He had thrown all the contents of the Anniversary Supper he had prepared beforehand yesterday into the bin. Including the incredibly out-of-place large red cake with icy frosting and the words "1st year - N&G" on top. There was no way Natsu would miss it.

This would all go to show how much Natsu cared. Gray refused to believe that Natsu didn't care at all, it wasn't possible. Perhaps he loved Lucy more, but surely he still saved some love for Gray. Gray was the one in an official relationship with him, after all.

He was pulled out of his thoughts when his boyfriend returned, dusting his hands on his pants.

Gray waited with bated breath. He waited for the apology sure to come and the way the other was going to make it up for him. He waited.

"There's something I need to tell you, Gray."

That's it. Continue. Then he would surely lower his head and say sorry in that adorable way he always did.

True enough, Natsu lowered his head. "I..."

"I'm going out today, Gray."

_What?_

Natsu never left after they made love. No matter what the occasion, the pink haired teen always stayed back and looked after him lovingly. So why today? What was different?

"We could use some jewels. I'm going on a mission."

Gray finally found his voice. "With who?"

Natsu's eyes were still cast towards the ground. "You know, the usual."

_Why do you look so guilty? Why do you avoid mentioning her name?_

"I see. Go ahead." Somehow he mustered up a smile. "Go kick some bastard's ass for me."

The dragon slayer finally lifted his head, looking relieved. "Okay. I'm leaving in an hour."

Gray shook his head. "Leave now."

Natsu looked surprised, but he did not question Gray.

"Ittekimasu."

Gray felt like crying. "Itterasshai."

When Natsu turned to leave, Gray changed his mind. He stood up quickly, his hand outstretched, his lips forming a word. However, he was unable to do so. Pain flared in his hips and lower back, and his legs gave out. He collapsed on the floor unceremoniously. As he watched Natsu going both farther and further away from him, he choked out, "Stay..."  
Gray Fullbuster was a fool. He knew the answers to all of his questions. It all came down to but one fact.

Lucy mattered to Natsu Dragneel way more than Gray ever could.

* * *

"A mission? Natsu, I don't think this is a good idea, especially not now." Lucy frowned in disapproval.

"Happy will be there. It's not like we'll be alone. Come on, Lucy! It's been ages since we went on a mission together. Just our mini team, the good old days. Don't you miss those days?"

"... All right. But no funny business, promise?"

Natsu grinned widely. "Promise!"

* * *

They ended up alone. They ended up together.

And while the dragon slayer hugged the one he loved, inhaling her scent, feeling like the happiest person in the world ; a certain ice Mage hugged his unfaithful lover's pillow, inhaling his scent, feeling like the loneliest person in the world.

* * *

Once. Twice. It happened again and again. Natsu was addicted.

Once, twice. Again and again, Gray turned a blind eye and when it came down to it, a deaf ear. He played ignorant.

Natsu was too important for him to lose.

Even though he knew that their relationship was doomed to end, he still held on by a thin, fragile thread.

Never once did he contemplate letting go. The idea of breaking up with Natsu never so much as crossed his mind.

Never once did he start doubting himself, until the signs became more and more obvious.

When he saw Lucy's lipstick on Natsu's collar, he put up his shield.

When Natsu told him that he would be staying over at Lucy's, he covered his ears.

When Natsu started going on missions with Lucy alone, he shut his eyes.

But the moment he saw a hickey on Natsu's neck, plain as day, he couldn't take it anymore.

Natsu didn't cover it up. Not even in front of him.

Why was he no longer trying his hardest to hide the signs of his affair? Why was he parading his hickey for the world to see when he knew, no, when _Gray_ would know it didn't come from him? For that matter, he hadn't even touched Gray for three weeks. Did he really think that Gray was dense enough to not notice? Or...

_Did their relationship matter so little to him?_

It was a scary thought.

Still, Gray's ice shield stood strong. He couldn't afford to break down.

"Gray, I have to - "

"Go out with Lucy today, right?" Gray interrupted. "Seriously, you guys are practically joined at the hip. You should just break up with me and start dating her."

Gray didn't mean it.

Natsu shook his head immediately, as if the idea terrified him. "I'll never break up with you, Gray. You know that."

Gray found the words contradictory to his actions. He stayed silent.

"I love you, Gray."

Gray turned his head to the side, screaming internally.

Why? Gray knew that the words weren't true, but why? He still believed it the moment he heard them. WHY? Why was Gray so weak?

"Gray?"

Gray almost laughed. Natsu actually looked concerned, he should audition to be an actor.

_Look at how much you've ruined me, Natsu Dragneel._

"It's nothing. Just go." Gray kept his face neutral.

Natsu shook his head again. "No, you misunderstood. I wanted to tell you to meet up with me tonight." He smiled. "At the usual spot. It's been a while."

Gray inhaled deeply. Yes, it had been a while. Funny considering Gray lived with Natsu and slept next to him. Although Natsu was seldom home anymore.

It was as if the day Gray moved in, Natsu moved out.

The house didn't feel like home anymore.

"Deal."

Night fell. Gray waited nervously underneath the Sakura tree.

He couldn't keep the smile off his face. This was stupid.

He shouldn't be so illogically happy just because the idiot remembered his birthday.  
This didn't make sense, in the same way it didn't that Gray wasn't mad at Natsu for cheating, just upset and disappointed.

He waited. Perhaps for this special day, Natsu would give him a nice surprise. His face reddened when he remembered the 'present' Natsu had given him the year before.  
He never pegged Natsu as the kinky type, so imagine his surprise when Natsu presented him with all kinds of sex toys. Even though they were alone, Gray couldn't shake off the embarrassment.

He hadn't been able to walk for a week.

Gray shook his head hard, ridding himself of the memory.

Suddenly he thought of another possibility, and sweat trickled down his forehead.

It couldn't be.

There was absolutely no way that Natsu would choose his birthday to break up with him. Right?

No.

Thinking was dangerous. Gray decided to stop thinking and simply wait.

He waited and waited, but strangely...

Natsu never showed up.

Gray finally gave up. He wandered around town without a destination in mind, and somehow he ended up on his way to the riverbank.

And what he saw had him halting abruptly in his tracks.

Pink hair. Blonde hair. A kiss.

Natsu was kissing Lucy, with passion he had never kissed Gray with.

Natsu was kissing another person. At the riverbank. The sacred spot that belonged to _them_.

Gray couldn't move. He could only stare as the kisses turned into a make out session. He lifted a hand to cover his mouth. Even though he already knew about the affair, seeing it right upfront was MUCH harder.

Gray left immediately after that. He didn't know what to do. He couldn't think. He needed company. He couldn't be alone that day, he just couldn't.

So he called Lyon out for a drink.

He did so fully knowing that Lyon liked him and the night would end with him in Lyon's arms.


	4. Chapter 3 - The Last Straw

_**Disclaimer : I do not own Fairy Tail nor do I profit from writing FanFiction.**_

_**Pairings : Natsu/Gray (main), LyoRay, NaLu, LoLu (so minor you won't even notice it)**_

_**Rating : M for sexual content.**_

_**Warnings : Yaoi, Shounen Ai, BL, whatever you call it. If you are triggered or disturbed by images of two guys kissing, I apologize and suggest you leave.**_

**_Natsu x Gray, established relationship. Unbeta-ed. Multi-chaptered._**

**_I thank everyone who reviewed, followed or favorited. I would never have the motivation to write if it weren't for you guys._**

* * *

_**Chapter 3 - The Last Straw**_

"I.. I don't want this." Gray's words were muffled by a passionate, feverish kiss. Hands were gliding all over his body in a possessive manner, and he would be lying if he said he wasn't getting aroused. Heaven knows how long it's been since he was touched like this.

Like he mattered to someone.

He returned the kiss with equal fervor, and slid his hands into silver hair. They kissed like there was no tomorrow, their tongues battling for dominance that wasn't really that important.

As for Lyon, all he cared about was that he had the man he loved in his arms once again. Willingly. (Despite his protests)

It had been too long.

They finally pulled away, a string of saliva connecting their mouths. Lyon rested his head gently on Gray's, and tried to smirk triumphantly. Somehow, all he could muster up was a happy, contented smile.

"What are you talking about? Come on, admit it. You want this." He taunted softly.

Gray let out a little laugh, and Lyon felt like he was in heaven.

"I don't want this, Lyon, you idiot." Gray pecked him on the lips unsuspectedly. "I need this."

* * *

Lyon knew that something was wrong the moment he saw Gray's face. They sat down at the bar, and to his utmost surprise, Gray ordered two glasses of cold water. At his stumped expression, the black-haired teen tried to smile but failed, sneering instead. "What? Did you think I called you out to get drunk? I'm not that stupid, Lyon."

The elder man immediately became as rigid as an ice sculpture. "I told you I'm sorry about what happened then."

Gray swirled his drink with his fingers and added a few blocks of ice. "Doesn't change the fact that you took me against my will."

Lyon's face darkened. "That's a low blow. I didn't rape you and you know it."

"You were drunk enough."

"I was completely in control. I fucked you and you begged for more. Nothing more, nothing less."

Gray winced. "Ouch."

"Don't pretend to be hurt when you said those words just to spite me. Spit it out, Gray. You didn't come all the way to the other side of Magnolia just to call me a rapist."

"Ouch ouch."

Agitated, Lyon complained, "Like I said," he promptly shut up when he saw the look on the other's face.

Gray's lower lip was trembling, and he looked up at Lyon through his dark bangs. His eyes shimmered with tears about to break free. "Ouch, Lyon..."

The elder disciple pulled his junior into his arms. "Gosh, Gray. Who hurt you? Why are you in pain?"

Gray sniffed. "Don't remind me. Natsu's in love with Lucy."

"What? Salamander and the Blondie?"

"Yeah..."

"So he broke up with you?" Lyon knew he shouldn't, but he couldn't help feeling elated at the news.

Gray shook his head.

"No? Then you broke up with him?" Lyon asked. "Good for you."

"Nope." Gray was shivering. "I didn't." A soft sob escaped his lips. "I'm so pathetic, Lyon! I caught them kissing at the riverside. The damn riverside of all places! That was _our_ special spot! How could that asshole just bring some other girl there and casually make out with her?!"

Lyon rubbed soothing circles into Gray's back, trying to calm and comfort him. He let Gray continue.

"But... It's not just some girl. It's _Lucy_. Lucy who he would put everything on the line for. I should have noticed sooner. Natsu once cried like a baby just because he thought Lucy was going to leave Fairy Tail. It hasn't been Nakama since the very beginning. And me?" Gray struggled to keep himself from losing control.

He breathed in deeply, and when he spoke, his words were crystal clear. "I'm nothing. I'm just a convenient nobody that cleans his house, cooks for him and assists him on missions. I'm just there. I guess it helps that I'm a good fuck."

"Gray..."

"I'm not degrading myself or anything. I don't have low self-esteem, you of all people should know that I'm the cockiest bastard you'll ever come across. It's just the simple truth that I hid from all this time."

One might have believed that Gray really didn't care, but this was Lyon. The man who had fallen in love with Gray since they were kids. He noticed the slight tremor in Gray's shoulders instantly.

"That was brave of you, Gray." Lyon placed a soft kiss on the top of his head. "Confronting the truth, it's not something everyone can achieve."

"Like that will change anything." Gray sounded immensely tired.

"Oh, but it changes everything. Facing that, gives you courage to move on."

The younger man jerked out of the embrace. "Move on? Lyon, I love the guy!"

"But does he love you?"

Gray fidgeted, "He says it every day."

"Does he love you?" Lyon repeated sternly.

Reluctantly, Gray mumbled, "No...maybe? I don't know."

"You want him to be happy, don't you? Not like he deserves it. But he's way more happy with this Lucy girl, isn't he? Then isn't the answer obvious?"

Gray lowered his head. "I need to think."

"Whatever you do, don't over think. Thinking's dangerous, trust me on this."

Gray laughed. "You've told me that before." _And somehow I have absorbed it into my brain._

"I suppose my job here is done. You've cheered up. Just, don't torture yourself by holding on. If you don't let go, you'll be trapped forever, and will never notice the presence of other people around you that care for you very much." Lyon said the last sentence meaningfully, but Gray didn't react.

He sighed. _Unrequited love sucks_. "Do you need me to walk you home?"

"Nah. I'm going home with you."

"Huh?"

"Remember how you dragged me into a motel and fucked me raw even though I told you 'no'?"

"I told you to drop it, Gray!"

"I remember. It felt damn good. And I want an encore."

Lyon couldn't believe his ears. "Are you serious? Don't fuck with me!"

Gray shrugged, "Natsu hasn't touched me for twenty-one days. We used to fuck every day, I've become accustomed to that. A guy has needs. Plus I know that you love my body."

Lyon clicked his tongue, cursing inwardly. _Shit. I don't just love your body, dammit! Why are you doing this to me?_

He made his decision.

"Don't chicken out, Gray. Are you sure you know what you're getting yourself into?"

"Come on, Lyon. Since when were you so wishy-washy?"

"Since every little thing that has to do with you!"

Both men were startled by the outburst, but silently agreed to ignore it.

Lyon suddenly grabbed Gray by the wrist and stood up, dragging him by force out of the bar. When they finally reached Lyon's house, the elder man picked the other up effortlessly and headed up the stairs. Then he proceeded to place him on the mattress and lean in for the kiss he had always longed for.

He lifted Gray's chin up gently, and whispered, "You are so beautiful."

Gray's eyes seemed to clear up for a moment. He stared at Lyon, and his lips moved. "I think... I don't want this. Shit, I'm dating Natsu. This is cheating!"

Lyon felt something shatter in his heart, but he simply narrowed his eyes. "This was your bright idea. I told you that there would be no backing out. I was serious."

"But I... I..." Having had enough, Lyon moved in to silence him with a kiss.

After Gray finally acknowledged that this was something he desired, Lyon started stripping.

Once done, he turned to the attractive man on his bed, grinning.

"Happy birthday, Gray."

* * *

Gray couldn't look Natsu in the eye. He felt guilty as hell. Just because Natsu was a cheater didn't mean that he could do the same. He felt sick.

He knew Lyon loved him, he had always known. And he had exploited that fact yesterday. In short, he used the one person who loved him unconditionally. In the morning, he had avoided Lyon like the plague, leaving before the man even woke up. What a sorry excuse of a human being he was.

And now, sitting in front of his boyfriend, he carefully tested the waters. Natsu didn't look mad. That was weird.

"About last night..."

Natsu's eyes immediately furrowed. _Here it comes._

"Yeah, about that."

Gray swallowed nervously.

"I'm sorry," Natsu muttered.

Gray was stupefied. "Huh?"

"I didn't show up. I had things to do."

"Oh, that. That's fine, I meant that last night..."

Natsu frowned. "Look, I'm sorry, okay? I don't have to report where I am to you twenty-four hours of the day!"

Gray stared at him until the dots slowly connected in his head.

_Natsu never noticed his absence. Because Natsu had not returned home last night._

He shook his head, nearly in denial. Natsu had spent the night at Lucy's, no doubt. Normally Gray would be able to ignore it, but yesterday had been his _birthday_. The one day of the whole damn year that was important.

That was the last straw.

* * *

_**reviews = faster updates ;)**_

_**I wanted to put the LyoRay smut in, but it didn't feel right. Now is not the right time. The Angst should be coming up soon (grins evilly). **_

_**- Dreams**_

**Anon replies :**

**Jezell : Thank you for reviewing and hope you enjoyed these new chapters :)**

**OMG : Gray didn't exactly dump him, but Lyon _did _sweep Gray into his arms ;)**

**Jambob1998 : I feel bad for making Natsu out as some kind of jerk, but the guy is in love. He can't help it. Not that it excuses his actions though. He's going to get heartbroken after a few chapters **


	5. Chapter 4 - No Turning Back

_**Disclaimer : I do not own Fairy Tail nor do I profit from writing FanFiction.**_

_**Pairings : Natsu/Gray (main), LyoRay, NaLu, LoLu (so minor you won't even notice it)**_

_**Rating : M for sexual content.**_

_**Warnings : Yaoi, Shounen Ai, BL, whatever you call it. If you are triggered or disturbed by images of two guys kissing, I apologize and suggest you leave.**_

**_Natsu x Gray, established relationship. Unbeta-ed. Multi-chaptered._**

* * *

**_Chapter 4 - No Turning Back_**

One week passed.

Gray hasn't shown up in the guild since. He hadn't been at home either, but it's not like Natsu would know. He only returned home for food and clothes, plus he always made sure Gray wouldn't be home when he was. He knew that avoidance just made him appear more guilty, but he couldn't help it. He just couldn't deal with Gray when he had his hands full with Lucy. Lucy was everything to him, and he could only hope that Loke spent more time sulking in the Spirit World. After all, if the Lion sulked for one day, Natsu would gain three months with Lucy.

Natsu did feel a bit mean. Gray didn't deserve this and he was well aware. He could have broken up with Gray when he had the chance, but he couldn't bring himself to do so and he didn't know why. Perhaps it was because Gray had been through enough in his life. Yes, that should be it.

Gray is an okay person, Natsu acknowledges (never out loud, of course). He may be petty over little things like who won their last fight or who stole his pants (the culprit was Natsu 99% of the time), but when it came to things that really mattered, he was surprisingly forgiving.

One particular incident had scared Natsu to bits. Gray had showed him a picture of Ur together with Lyon and he. It looked like a family portrait. Natsu had decided that he was jealous and pretended to burn the photo. Except he actually burned it to ashes. He didn't mean it, and when he saw Gray's horrified and hurt expression he nearly kicked himself.

Gray had forgiven him. Sure, he ordered Natsu to 'disappear from his sight' for a whole week, but he forgave him eventually.

Which comes back to the reason Natsu can't break it to Gray that he was cheating on him, with one of the members of their team no less. He understood that the knowledge would break him. Because he also knew that despite his appearance, Gray had a fragile heart.

_Sometimes Natsu wished that he loved Gray_.

Because Gray was all in all, pretty awesome. Selfless, brave and heroic. Sensitive, gentle (sometimes) and caring. But most of all, Gray was loving (even though he denied it vehemently).

Natsu wasn't a jerk to play around with someone's feelings, let alone the feelings of a close Nakama. So why did he accept Gray's proposal of a relationship when he harbored no romantic feelings for him?

Because yet again, Natsu knew. Natsu knows Gray like the back of his hand. To be honest, how could he not have noticed when Gray made so many slip-ups?

Like the time Gray told him not to die during the Erigor case. And the time he got unbelievably mad when he found out that Natsu had been consumed by Fukuro. There were many moments that betrayed Gray's true feelings, but each time, Natsu pretended not to hear. He found it kind of cute, but thinking of his long time rival as cute was awfully weird so he ignored it.

He couldn't hurt Gray by rejecting him. Even though at the moment, he wonders if it would be better had he done so then instead of being an unfaithful bastard and cheating on him now.

So Natsu told him every day that he loved him. Because he wished that if he said it enough, he might actually come to love him. It would make things so much easier.

Of course, that was before Lucy broke up with Loke. Because no matter how much Natsu cares about Gray, Lucy always comes first.

Now... Now Natsu was just running away.

* * *

Lyon began showing up at the guild every day, looking worried. Natsu had asked him for a duel (since he never got the chance to kick his ass and prove to Gray that he was stronger), but Lyon had blatantly ignored him and asked for Gray. With each passing day, the snowy haired man looked more and more distressed. Natsu heard him mention that Gray was avoiding him, and he wondered what happened between them.

Not that it mattered, Gray's business was his own. Natsu has to go on more missions with Lucy anyway, she was short on rent again.

Meanwhile, Gray was running away from the world.

Gray had wandered around town a bit, and returned to his old house during the night. It turned out that the new owner merely bought his house to rent it out, so ironically, Gray rented his own house.

He had no home. His old house was renovated, and the place he shared with Natsu was simply a place to live. He found familiarity and comfort nowhere.

Having no home reminded him of his childhood, of his travels with Ur and Lyon.

Speaking of Lyon, he hoped Lyon didn't assume that he was ignoring or hiding from him or anything stupid like that. He just needed some time alone.

He finally sorted things out. He was going to make the most difficult decision of his life.  
However, he would give Natsu one last chance. Thus on that fateful day, he headed to the guild and sought him out.

"I'm leaving today on an S class mission with Lyon for two weeks." Gray gauged Natsu's expression.

Natsu did his best to keep the grin from splitting across his face. Finally! Time alone with Lucy, without having to hide, and two weeks at that!

"I see."

"...Do you want to come? We could use your help."

"No, you go. I'm sure you need some alone time with Lyon. It's been a while since you talked, you guys should make up."

Gray cast his eyes towards the ground. "Okay. Do you want to know where we're going?"

Natsu dismissed him, "Not really."

Desperate, Gray asked again, "This mission is important to me. I want to go with you, just the two of us. Can we?"

"I can't, Gray. I promised Lucy to help her with a minor mission tomorrow. I don't break promises, remember?"

"Of course you don't." Gray laughed lowly. "Hey, Flame brain?"

Already impatient to leave and tell Lucy the good news, Natsu replied irritatedly, "What?"

"Can you tell me you love me again?"

"Of course I do, idiot." Natsu said hastily.

"Just those three words."

"You're being awfully bothersome today, Gray..."

Natsu took a deep breath, hoping that he looked convincing, and answered, "I love you."

Gray smiled. Natsu hadn't looked convincing at all. But he would treasure those three words to the end of time.

"I love you too."_ And this is the last time I'll say these words to you._

Honestly, Gray hadn't given up yet. So he had tried to reevaluate his importance, but had been severely disappointed.

This was it.

There would be no turning back.

* * *

"Umm... Hi."

The ice mages stared awkwardly at each other in silence. Gray shifted his weight from one foot to the other.

"So... You wanna go on a mission?"

Lyon blinked. "A mission?"

"Yeah. A joint mission. Together. S class and shit."

"If I don't?"

"Then I'll drag you with me since I already told the others that I'm going with you." Gray answered honestly.

Lyon frowned, "How democratic of you," he remarked sarcastically.

"I'm counting on you, Lyon."

The elder ice Mage sighed in defeat. "Fine, just give me some time to pack. Come in."

* * *

Natsu never even noticed that Gray had packed all his clothes and belongings. He never noticed that Gray didn't just pack for a short mission. No, Gray had _moved out._

But he didn't know.

He didn't notice that Gray didn't return after two weeks.

Two weeks became three, and three weeks became four.

Even after three months, he never saw the letter that Gray left on his bedside table.

He was busy.

He was busy holding her hand.

He was busy kissing her lips.

He was busy earning rent money with her.

Yes, he had been very busy.

_He was too busy making love with Lucy on the bed that Gray had once slept in._

* * *

_**Long chapter coming up. Please review, reviews (plus follows and favorites) are such motivation**__** ;)**_

_**- Dreams**_

**Replies to Anons ~**

**SomeRandomAnon : Wait you love LyoRay? You don't see that everyday, I'm so glad that we LyoRay fans have united! (tears of joy)**

**Drewfullbuster : Thank you! :3**

**vanessa : I'm flattered, thanks! **


	6. Chapter 5 - Running Away

_**Disclaimer : I do not own Fairy Tail nor do I profit from writing FanFiction.**_

_**Pairings : Natsu/Gray (main), LyoRay, NaLu, LoLu (so minor you won't even notice it)**_

_**Rating : M for smut.**_

_**Warnings : Yaoi, Shounen Ai, BL, whatever you call it. If you are triggered or disturbed by images of two guys kissing, I apologize and suggest you leave.**_

**_Natsu x Gray, established relationship. Unbeta-ed. Multi-chaptered._**

* * *

**_Chapter 5 - Running Away_**

_-Three Months Ago-_

Gray got to work silently, packing all his belongings into a suitcase. Not that he had much to do, he didn't really own much. When he had stepped into Fairy Tail for the first time after Ur sealed Deliora, all he had with him was his cross necklace and a crumpled photo of his teacher and his elder disciple. And thanks to his idiot boyfr_- _**EX**_-_boyfriend, that photo was no more.

Once done, he began opening drawers and closets, double-checking to make sure he didn't leave anything behind. He wanted to have a clean break, a thorough ending.

He wanted it to look like he had never moved in.

To be more precise, he wanted it to seem like they had never been together. As if their 'we' had never existed.

He would prolong their suffering no more.

"If we can't go back to the way we were, then we'll go back even further. Back to the time we were just close friends, nothing more."

That was what he thought.

He had his mind set, but carrying it out was harder than it seemed. However, like he decided before, there would be no turning back.

After picking up a stray shirt or two, he went as far as to sweep out the contents under their - **Natsu's** bed.

_Just how did his underwear get there - wait._

Gray stared at cardboard box labelled 'For Gray'.

Cautious but curious, he opened it. Then he proceeded to blush as red as a tomato.  
All the sex toys Natsu had bought for him last year were there. The dildo, rope, wax, handcuffs, buttplug, anal beads and even the fucking _nipple clamps _were there, among others.

He shut the box quickly and threw it out the window without a second thought.

"Like hell I'm taking that with me!"

The black-haired teen wiped his brow and zipped up his suitcase. That was everything. Then he caught sight of the photo frame on the bedside table.

He wanted to smile and feel nostalgic, but instead all he could feel was overwhelming sadness.

It was the one and only photo they had taken. Or rather, the only portrait Reedus drew that only consisted of the two of them.

That day, Gray had protected Natsu by conjuring up three humongous ice ramparts, subsequently wearing himself out. Natsu, being the good boyfriend that he was, had carried Gray home on his back, teasing him all the way.

They were happily in love back then.

Or at the very least, _Gray_ had been.

Looking at the picture, Gray's shoulders began to shake uncontrollably, but he willed the tears back. He would shed no more tears for this man.

However, waves of memories kept on invading his brain.

Memories of Natsu saying he loved him kept coming back.

The day Gray confessed, and Natsu wrapped his arms around him in a heartwarming embrace. The first time they intertwined their fingers. Their embarrassing but sweet first kiss. Their first date. Their first night together as a couple. The first time they made love. And the first time Gray woke up in his arms, feeling warm and safe.

Gray believed all of it.

He believed every word, every moment, every touch.

I believed your _lies_.  
Every _smile_ was a lie.  
Every _word_ was a lie.  
Every _touch_ was a lie.  
_Everything was a complete lie._

_I was foolish to ever believe you when you said that our love was eternal.  
You never even loved me_.

Gray toyed with the metal ring on his thumb, admiring the flame symbol that bound him to Natsu. It was stupid and sappy, but they had actually got couple rings together. Gray wore this one, and Natsu wore another one that had the symbol of ice on it. It symbolized that they were bound to each other, protected each other and belonged to each other.

In short, it was meaningless now.

Gray took the ring off and placed it beside the photo frame.

"I'd love to take it with me, but that would mean taking some of you with me." Gray uttered the words softly. "I would never be able to truly let go if I did that."

Lastly, he carefully folded a piece of paper into an envelope and put it onto the table. All set.

Leaving without confronting Natsu was a cowardly thing to do, but Gray never said that he wasn't one. Plus, Natsu would probably appreciate his silent departure over him throwing a fit.

"I won't miss you." Gray declared firmly, but he couldn't even convince himself.

Gray didn't find it hard to leave the house. He hadn't had the chance to build up any memories there. So he heaved his suitcase over his shoulder and headed to Lamia Scale without a second glance backwards.

* * *

"By the way, I'm moving in with you."

Trying to look displeased, Lyon scolded, "Stop deciding everything by yourself, bastard."

"Sorry. But you're the only one I can go to right now, Lyon." Gray looked guilty.

As well he should be. Lyon wasn't a fool, he knew that he was being used. Gray was selfishly using him to run away from Natsu, and Lyon was letting him do so.

Ah, perhaps that made him a fool. A fool in love.

"Whatever." Lyon finished packing and turned back to his younger disciple, asking, "Which mission are we going on?"

"Er..."

Lyon rolled his eyes. "Fine, I'll choose. We're going to Isvan."

Gray's eyes widened. "Isvan? Lyon, no!"

"I saw the request on Lamia's request board yesterday. S class. Should be able to kill some time."

Gray argued, "That's not the issue. You know that I can't go back to Isvan!"

"Why are you so determined to avoid your past, Gray?"

"I..."

Seeing Gray's troubled expression, Lyon sighed. "Okay. We'll go on some other mission."

Gray said softly, "Thanks."

Lyon smiled. "Don't mention it. Now, let's set one thing straight."

The younger Mage cocked his head to the side. "What?"

"Even if you're just running away, understand that I don't do lazy missions without concentration. If we're gonna do this then we'll do this right. You are not going to pull either mine or Lamia Scale's reputation down the drain."

Gray nodded seriously. "That's a given."

Lyon held out his fist, "Let's be the badass partners from different guilds!"

Gray punched it lightly with his own, "Deal. Let's become famous!"

They grinned, and suddenly Gray didn't feel so lonely anymore.

* * *

_- Three months later -_

"Ne, Natsu?"

Natsu hummed, burying his face into Lucy's long blonde locks. "Hmm?"

"I haven't seen Gray for a while..."

Natsu didn't open his eyes. "Gray? Who's that?"

Lucy hit him with her pillow. "I'm being serious here!"

The pink haired teen cracked an eye open. "What about him?"

"Didn't he say that he was going on a two-week-mission?"

Natsu confirmed, "Yeah."

"Well, it's been two weeks, Natsu. Six fortnights, to be exact. Why hasn't he returned? I'm worried."

"Has it been that long?" Natsu scrunched his eyebrows, thinking. "He should be fine, Lyon's with him. That guy's stronger than I'd like to admit."

"If you say so..."

Despite what Natsu said, he was worried. He just didn't take action because he believed in Gray. He believed in his strength and his wit.

He trusted him to return safely. He trusted Gray so blindly that he never thought of searching for him.

But Lucy was right. What mission takes three months?

Lucy was always right.

* * *

"Hey, Sorcerer Weekly is out! Look at Mirajane's gravure, she's beautiful as always!"

Natsu trudged on, not particularly interested.

"Hah! Fairy Tail's Salamander's out for destruction again! Gosh, it's like we pay them to destroy stuff, ugh."

The dragon slayer whirled around instantly. He was about to give the person a piece of his mind and an ass-kicking when another girl said something that caught his attention.

"Forget Salamander, look at this! It's the Ice Brothers!"

_Ice? Could it be you?_

"These guys are real professionals. Twenty missions, all of them S class, done in merely three months!" The guy before commented, admiration in his voice.

_You went on an S class mission, didn't you?_

"Plus they're so hot!"

_Please let this be you._

"Hot? They're Ice Make Mages, Nelly."

_I think I miss you._

"Look, Tes. It says here that they've returned to Magnolia."

_You're back?!_

"The Younger Brother lived here, after all. You know, Gray Fullbuster."

_Lived? What's with the past tense?_

"Of course I know! He used to leave his clothes all over the place. Actually, they both have reputations of stripping. I dunno if it's true, but it's said that they do simultaneous stripping. Gosh, I ship them so hard, Tes!"

"Nelly... They're brothers."

"Not related by blood. I checked. Come on, you can't look at each other every day, work together, have each other's backs and trust each other like that without falling in love! Plus _simultaneous stripping_!"

Tes ruffled Nelly's hair. "Hai, hai."

Natsu stood still, the words ringing in his head.

He ignored the last part. Like Gray would cheat on him with Lyon, that's absurd. Gray loved him too much.

What's important was that _Gray was back._

Gray would finally be returning home. Heck, he might be waiting at home for him! Natsu couldn't stop smiling.

All colour suddenly drained from his face when he remembered a tiny detail.

_Lucy was in his house._

Natsu broke into a run.

_No. No. No. Please don't let him see her._

Out of breath, he finally reached home. He yanked open the door and hurried in, yelling, "Gray!"

"Natsu?"

It wasn't Gray. And for once seeing Lucy did nothing to lift his spirits.

"Lucy! Right, leave now, Lucy!"

"Huh?"

"Just get out of here!"

The gears in Lucy's head began to turn. "Gray's back?"

Natsu nodded fervently. "Any moment."

_How wrong he was._

Lucy smiled sincerely. "Thank goodness! I was seriously getting worried. I'm glad."

Natsu couldn't help but grin, "I missed the bastard. Now if you'll just hurry up..."

Lucy laughed and picked up her bag. "Of course."

After Lucy left, Natsu sped around the house, getting rid of all the evidence that pointed to his affair. Gray was sharp, he had to be really thorough.

Something felt off as he threw some of Lucy's clothes and lingerie out, but he couldn't pinpoint what. He dismissed the bad feeling, focusing on his task. He couldn't even imagine what to do if Gray found out he had cheated, the idea sickened him to the core. He worked hard, a smile never leaving his face.

_Gray was coming home._

When he was finally done, he sat down on the couch and waited.

_Three months, damn! Time sure flies._

He waited and waited, but... Gray never showed up.

Fidgeting, he decided to check if there was anything he hadn't cleaned out. He headed to the bedroom first, since it was the most important crime scene.

That was when he saw an envelope lying innocently on his bedside table.

_Was Lucy writing to her mom again?_

Curious and disrespecting privacy like he always did, he opened the envelope.

He was greeted by neat, familiar handwriting.

_Gray! When in the world?_

He quickly read the letter, and his blood ran cold.

_"Natsu,_

_I suppose now is a good time to come clean with you._

_I fell in love with your honesty and straight-forwardness. I fell in love with your bravery and your awkward kindness. I fell in love with your voice and your smile. I fell in love with YOU. Your personality, your looks, your body, your good points, your flaws, your past, I love them all._

_I loved you enough to look past the fact that you did not love me._

_Falling in love with you, was the worst mistake I have ever made._

_So thank you for humoring me and letting me love you. Thank you, and goodbye. I love you so much, but I don't think I'm strong enough to hold on anymore. So I'm letting you go. You're free now. Free of the burden known as Gray Fullbuster. I wish you all the best, Natsu Dragneel._

_Maybe one day we'll meet again when we're different people. Maybe then we'll be better for each other._

_Maybe not._

_Your ex-boyfriend, Gray."_

_**NO. NO NO NO NO NO. This couldn't be. Gray broke up with me? Since when?**_

He flipped the piece of paper over and noticed the date, a week after Gray's birthday. Shit, _Gray's birthday. _It had completely slipped his mind. That couldn't be the reason, could it? Gray wasn't that small-minded.

"That long? Impossible, all his belongings are still here..." _Hold on._

_No._

This was what felt off just now.

_Gray's stuff were nowhere to be seen._

"You... Can't be serious..." Natsu's heart contracted painfully.

"Is this the only letter?" He frantically returned his gaze to the table, and was pierced once again by freezing icicles.

_Gray's ring_. It was lying on the table, beside their photo.

"You really... mean this..."

Natsu gazed at the ring on his own ring finger, staring at the ice design.

The rings bound him to Gray and vice-versa.

_Is that what you meant when you said you were setting me free?_

_Did you know? _

_Have you known all along that I didn't return your feelings? Is that why?_

Natsu took off his Ice Ring and placed it beside Gray's Flame Ring.

_Right. Why am I this shaken? I'm free._

_I love Lucy, not you. I should be happy that I escaped confrontation. Right?_

_So why? Why am I hurting so? Why is the idea of you moving out, you **leaving me** so unbearable?_

* * *

_**I was surprised at the sudden increase in reviews, but man was that a wonderful surprise! Knowing that people read and appreciate what I write just makes me so happy, thank you!**_

_**-Dreams**_


	7. Chapter 6 - Confusion

_**Disclaimer : I do not own Fairy Tail nor do I profit from writing FanFiction.**_

_**Pairings : Natsu/Gray (main), LyoRay, NaLu, LoLu (so minor you won't even notice it)**_

_**Rating : M for sexual content.**_

_**Warnings : Yaoi, Shounen Ai, BL, whatever you call it. If you are triggered or disturbed by images of two guys kissing, I apologize and suggest you leave.**_

**_Natsu x Gray, established relationship. Unbeta-ed. Multi-chaptered._**

* * *

**_Chapter 6 - Confusion_**

Lucy stroked Natsu's unruly pink hair as he slept, her mind elsewhere. Leo's celestial spirit key seemed to be biting into her skin, signaling Loke's rage.

She was waiting. All this time, she had been waiting for Loke to summon himself in a flash of light and take her in a burst of royal fury.

She had a plan, but it backfired. No matter how far her relationship with Natsu went, Loke never showed up. Perhaps the idea had been stupid from the beginning. Triggering a lion's jealousy, really? Lions have tons of mates, and similarly, Loke was a playboy. No matter how frequently he had professed his love for her in the past, his absence now proved that he didn't really care all that much.

Either way, it was too late to back down. Once she started using Natsu, there was no guarantee of safe return. She was tired. How much longer should she continue this farce?

One might wonder, how did Lucy come up with such a plan in the first place when it wasn't in her nature to deliberately hurt anyone, let alone a close friend?

The answer was simple - because it hadn't been a plan then. It had just been pure spite. She hadn't wanted to get back with Loke at all.

It was sick and wrong, but she felt a strong feeling of achievement knowing that even if she broke up with Magnolia's most wanted man, Magnolia's strongest Mage would still want her. She didn't want to appear to be disposable or dispensable. Due to Loke's reputation, she had heard rumors of her being dumped instead of the other way round, and it damaged her ego. Thus she avoided using Leo's celestial key and started hanging out with Natsu.

She was never the one to suggest their meetings. All she had done was accept. So she was not completely to blame, that was what she told herself to soothe the horrible guilt.

Slowly, she realized that while there was no doubt that she felt guilty for going behind Gray's back, what actually made her feel like the worst person in the world was being with someone else, someone who wasn't _Loke_.

She hadn't been lying when she said she still loved Loke. She never stopped loving him. She just went through a weird phase that made her believe that they weren't compatible, that they were better off as Master and Spirit, nothing more.

She was wrong. Every time she kissed Natsu, all she could think of was _Loke, Loke, Loke._

Then she realized that doing so may reignite the flame that was missing from their relationship then. They had been tiring each other out due to the time difference and the lion's need to see her every second of the day, but this, this affair (even though they were clearly on a break) just might serve as a reminder to him that they weren't over. That as soon as Loke took the first step, Lucy would welcome him with open arms.

But Loke did not take the first step.

And everything spiraled out of control.

Lucy had always been praised for being smart and observant. Naturally she noticed.  
Natsu's eyes were no longer focused on her.

Since Gray's return to Magnolia, Natsu had clung to her side like a child to his mother, using her to shield himself.

He kissed her and touched her, but his heart was no longer in it.

Was Lucy using Natsu, or was Natsu using Lucy?

She didn't know.

* * *

"Lyon, stop it... Mmph..." Gray struggled against his elder disciple, trying to put a stop to his advances.

"Stop... Aaaaah!" Letting out a pleasure-filled moan, Gray's cheeks quickly flushed a fierce shade of red.

Lyon released the nipple he was sucking and biting on and smirked. "I don't think you want me to."

Strong fingers cupped the black-haired male's butt cheeks and began squeezing and caressing it sensually, causing him to shiver, putty in the other's arms.

"You're so damn lewd, Gray." Lyon's tongue flicked over the shell of Gray's ear. "Seriously? Strutting your junk around for the world to see every day? It's like an open invitation."

Gray didn't reply.

His eyes narrowing for a millisecond, Lyon pulled the naked body closer to him and kicked the long legs apart.

A slicked finger slid into Gray's entrance, and he gasped at the intrusion.

Lyon whispered into his younger disciple's ear, "No stripping tomorrow." Then he proceeded to bite down on Gray's neck, marking the otherwise unblemished skin.

Gray was holding it in, but he couldn't hold back the soft pleasured sigh when the teeth cut into his skin. Yes, that was the feeling. Being marked, becoming somebody's possession. Natsu used to do it all the time -

His eyes widened. With a hard shove, he pushed Lyon off him and grabbed the blankets around him, covering himself.

"Gray?" Lyon asked tentatively, his voice laced with concern but his eyes portraying hurt.

Gray couldn't meet his eyes. He didn't want to see the disappointment.

"I said no."

That was bullshit and they both knew it. Gray _always_ said no in the beginning, but he never meant it.

After a long pause, Gray added, "I'm sorry."

Lyon stared at him, his expression unreadable. Then he walked closer.

"Get rid of that stupid blanket."

"Lyon-"

Before he could finish his sentence, the covers were ripped away, leaving him bare, naked for the other to see. Somewhat upset, he protested indignantly, "Listen to me-"

A gentle hand caressed his face.

Lyon spoke softly, "Lift your arms, okay?"

His mind blank, Gray obeyed. His dark blue undershirt was slipped on with ease.

"...Oh."

Lyon continued, "Now your legs."

Blushing a bit, Gray complied, and let the other put his boxers and pants on.

"... Thanks." The black-haired teen turned his head to the side. "Sorry for misunderstanding."

Lyon smiled. "Don't worry about it." Then he turned and began pacing away.

"Where are you going?" Gray called after him.

"I have a little..." Lyon scratched the back of his head awkwardly. "...condition to attend to."

His cheeks reddening with recognition, Gray got up and followed.

Visibly surprised, Lyon asked, "What are you coming for?"

"To help."

Puzzled, Lyon clarified slowly, "Um. I'm going to jack off, Gray."

Gray rolled his eyes. "How stupid do you take me for? I know that."

"So..."

"I'm not going to let you fuck me, but there are many ways to make a man come." Gray couldn't believe what he was saying. Willing his blush down, he grabbed Lyon's wrist and led him back to the bed. Once Lyon was seated comfortably, he proceeded to kneel down submissively.

"Gray, what are you...?"

Gray lifted his head and maintained eye contact. "Order me."

"Huh?"

"Order me to pleasure you. I'll do anything."

Blood was pooling to Lyon's nether regions, but he withheld himself, opting to say, "You don't have to do this for me, Gray."

Firmly, Gray told him, "I want to."

Lyon hesitated for another few seconds, then he opened his mouth, issuing an order.

"Take off my pants."

Gray immediately got to work, his hand reaching out for the zipper in front of him. However, he was stopped.

"With your mouth, Gray."

Swallowing, Gray did his best, leaning in and trying to get the zipper between his teeth. After a bit of awkward fumbling, he finally succeeded. Carefully pulling it down, he looked up at Lyon, awaiting the next order.

Lyon was silent, seeming to be in a silent debate with himself. Impatient, Gray yanked the pants down to the knees using his hands and stuck out his tongue to lick the erection straining against Lyon's boxers.

"Nngh!" Unconsciously, Lyon's hips bucked forward.

Nodding in approval, Gray pulled the boxers off and mentally prepared himself, licking his lips and opening his mouth wide.

Gazing at the man he loved staring lustfully at his penis, Lyon's control snapped.

"Ah, fuck it." He lurched forward suddenly, forcing his dick past Gray's moist lips.

"Mmmmmph!" Gray choked when the hard length hit the back of his throat. He tried to pull back, but Lyon was having none of that.

He held Gray's head in place, his fingers yanking Gray's hair painfully.

"Sorry," Lyon panted as he thrust in and out of the hot and wet cavern, "You're too sexy for your own good."

Trying hard to adjust, Gray widened his mouth as much as possible. When he choked yet again, tears sprung forth and his eyebrows furrowed.

Yet until Lyon reached his climax, he never pulled back. He didn't show any signs of how uncomfortable he was. When Lyon came, he swallowed every last drop of the semen, not letting even a drop slip past his lips. By the time he finally looked up at Lyon's eyes, panting slightly, he expected to see satisfaction.

Nothing prepared him for the coldness that pierced into his very soul.

"Lyon..."

He was cut off.

"Get out, Gray."

"Wha..."

"I said get out."

_I don't want to say or do anything to you that I might regret._

Even though he was getting awfully intimidated, the black-haired teen retaliated with all he had.

"Don't be an ungrateful bastard! In case you didn't notice, I just sucked you off!"

"Gray."

For a split second, Lyon's tone sounded like Ur's - gentle but stern, and more than enough to shut Gray up.

"Listen. I don't want you to force yourself into anything. I know you didn't feel good, I could feel your throat contracting, your gag reflex trying to make itself useful. And that's why I'm mad." Lyon paused for a bit, carefully searching for the appropriate words. "You're doing this out of guilt. I don't want that."

Gray bit the inside of his cheek. "And who are you to dictate what I do and my reasons behind it?"

"As your lover, I want us to be together because we care for each other deeply, but all you think about..." Lyon grit his teeth, spitting the name out as if it was poison. "Is _Natsu_. It's been twelve weeks, Gray. He never contacted you. Never inquired into your whereabouts. Even though we return to Magnolia frequently to accept new requests, he never made an appearance. It's high time you move on, Gray."

"That's exactly what I'm doing! Can't you see that I'm trying my damnedest to move on? Does me taking the initiative mean nothing to you?"

"This isn't moving on! Open your eyes, Gray! What you're doing has been from the start, and is still, running away! Every time I touch you intimately, you're reminded of _him_. How the fuck do you think that makes me feel? Fucking happy and appreciated?" Lyon's voice had begun to rise unconsciously, his control cracking bit by bit.

_No. Don't do this. Don't drive him away._

But he couldn't stop. It was as if his mouth had a mind of its own.

"We're lovers, Gray! I'm not some stinking substitute! Have you sunk that low?"

He regretted the words immediately, but it was too late.

Gray looked eerily calm when he spoke. "Yes. I'm the lowest of the lowest. I'm using you, can't you see that? You're so smart, I bet you saw through that long ago. Then what does that make you? Have _you_ sunk low enough to be contented with just being a substitute?"

_No. You don't mean this. Stop it. Speak more and everything you've built up with this man who loves you will be ruined. You want to be with him, don't you?_

Still Gray continued.

"Natsu doesn't give two fucks about me, but guess what? I can't forget him, I love him that much. And you? You should just give up. No matter how much you love me, I'll never reciprocate."

Gray was being unreasonably mean. He knew that he was being unfair and spiteful, but he was stressing himself out and he needed to take it out on someone. Blame Lyon for being in the wrong place at the wrong time.

He ended with a harsh statement.  
"We're fucking, Lyon. Not dating. I'm your roommate, not your fucking boyfriend."

Hearing those words, Lyon nearly broke down then and there. As it was, he struggled to keep his expression passive when Gray turned his back on him and strutted out the room.  
But the moment the smaller figure rounded the corner, Lyon lost every little bit of control he had. Uncaring of his appearance, he screamed in agony, crouching down with his head in his hands.

_Why?_

He remembered the moment he fell in love with Gray. The young naïve boy who needed him to teach him how to conjure up a shield because he wanted to show off to Ur.

He remembered all of his love converting to hate when Ur sacrificed herself.

He remembered falling in love all over again when Gray smiled at him, ever forgiving, and suggested he join a guild.

_Why?_

He remembered the shock when he found out Gray's love for Natsu. And the sound of his heart shattering to pieces when they started dating. He remembered Gray coming to him after they broke up, and the hope rising within him.

_Why?_

He remembered, reminisced. The moment Gray smiled at him and took his hand, kissing him. Telling him that he was important. Letting him make a mess out of Gray's body. These three months had been heaven. Taking on missions, looking out for each other, taking turns cooking, joking around, and making love.

But _Why?_

Had he just been purely delusional? Maybe he should heed Gray's advice and give up. He would never be able to provide Gray with Natsu's warmth. He didn't possess the fire to do so, all he had was his frozen soul.

He wanted to give up.

Standing up, he noticed that tears were streaming down his face. His hands shaking, he wiped his eyes with determination.

_No. There would be no giving up. Gray needs him. He couldn't let Gray go, Gray was too fragile. He had to hold on and be strong, for Gray's sake._

* * *

Gray despised himself.

He had no right to accuse Lyon of being ungrateful. The jerk playing around with people's feelings was none other than himself.

He wanted to move on, he truly did. He believes that he can come to love Lyon. In fact, he could feel it happening gradually as the days passed. With time, his heart would definitely be able to accept Lyon as his lover.

Lyon, who was the polar opposite of Natsu.

No use crying over spilt milk. All chances with Lyon were probably gone, no thanks to his stupid mouth.

He trudged down the familiar streets of Magnolia with his head lowered, stripping himself of his clothes.

Suddenly, he bumped shoulders with someone. Irritated, he snapped, "Watch where you're going-"

Light returned to his eyes.

"Na..." He coughed. "Natsu?"

* * *

**_I thank everyone who reviewed, followed or favorited. I would never have the motivation to write if it weren't for you guys. Truth is, I encountered writer's block (so early in the story?!) and I'm not really satisfied with this chapter. Hope it was up to expectation._**

**_Please review and give me your thoughts. Suggestions are always welcome ;)_**

**_P.S. I dunno if anybody noticed, but Nelly and Tes from the last chapter are Nel Tu Odelschvank and Tesla from Bleach ^^_**

**_Oh, and Happy Chinese New Year! (I'm a Chinese Malaysian, haha)_**

**_-Dreams_**

**Anon replies :**

**Guest : I love angst too, it's like my favorite genre. I just love heartbreak lol**

**Kiwi : I was worried over whether my style of writing was able to bring out emotion, and I'm glad that you reassured me. Thank you.**

**Guest : I dunno whether you're the same guest, haha but thanks for reviewing!**

**SomeRandomAnon : And _you _make my day by reviewing! ;)**

**vanessa cruz : Thank you and here is your chapter! ^^**


	8. Chapter 7 - Realization

_**Disclaimer : I do not own Fairy Tail nor do I profit from writing FanFiction.**_

_**Pairings : Natsu/Gray (main), LyoRay, NaLu, LoLu (so minor you won't even notice it)**_

_**Rating : M for sexual content.**_

_**Warnings : Yaoi, Shounen Ai, BL, whatever you call it. If you are triggered or disturbed by images of two guys kissing, I apologize and suggest you leave.**_

**_Natsu x Gray, established relationship. Unbeta-ed. Multi-chaptered._**

* * *

**_Chapter 7 - Realization_**

"Natsu."

"Yeah?"

"We should stop this- whatever we're doing. I can't. No more."

"Lucy?"

"I'm not evil, and I'm not heartless. Gosh, Natsu, I can't do this! It's dragged on longer than it should ever have. I... No, you... Natsu." Lucy massaged her temples slowly, her eyebrows furrowed.

"I shouldn't even need to bring this up. You _know_. There's no way you don't. I'm still not in love with you." Lucy smiled weakly. "And despite what it may seem, you're not in love with me either."

Natsu kept his lips sealed and his expression neutral.

"I guess... I don't need to tell you who I did this for. And you..." Lucy put her hands on Natsu's shoulders. "Look at you." Tenderly, she stroked his cheek. "It's taking its toll on you, you know. You look exhausted. The bags under your eyes are getting more and more prominent. This isn't healthy." She smiled again, this time knowingly.

"All for him."

Natsu did not deny the statement.

Lucy continued, elaborating like it was a normal fact, speaking it out loud for the words to sink in. "Fifty-hundred million Jewel, huh? You've worked so hard these days, yet the target is still so far away. I admire your determination, but I don't really understand the reason behind your actions. Why are you that set on buying it back?"

Natsu finally spoke. Never breaking eye contact, he said, "That guy did it for me. If it weren't for me, he would still have a home." He cast his eyes to the ground. "I'm... The worst. I never truly appreciated him, and what did I do? I persuaded him to sell his house, robbing him of his home, only to tell him to move in with a person who doesn't deserve him at all. And I was all self-righteous about it. Like, 'he would be lonely out there' or 'I'm doing this for him' when I was just plain selfish." Natsu paused. "Anyway, I have to buy it. He needs a place to stay when he returns permanently."

"But is he going to return? People are saying that he's moved... How could he keep quiet about something like that?"

"He's returning." Natsu's tone was sure and confident, but his eyes portrayed a different thing altogether. "But... I doubt he still wants to live with me."

"Don't say that. You know that he loves you." Even when she offered words of comfort, she felt sick. She knew that Gray loved Natsu, yet... "Wait, why did he leave in the first place? Natsu, did he find out about us?"

Natsu shook his head, "No, he didn't. I guess he just finally had enough of me not loving him."

"But you do."

"..."

"And that is why you're doing this."

Natsu chuckled. "I thought you didn't understand my reasoning?"

The blonde-haired girl let out a soft tinkle of laughter, and Natsu smiled. It no longer set his heart on fire.

Lucy grinned, "Gosh, this is really hard to get used to. A mature Natsu, wow! Never expected to see that in my lifetime."

Natsu shrugged. "I'm not half as dense as I appear to be."

"Guess so." Lucy held out a hand, and Natsu stared at the smooth, white skin. "Still friends?"

"Don't be silly, Lucy." Natsu grabbed the hand in a firm handshake. "Best friends."

_When was it?_

_When did he stop loving Lucy?_

_No._

He didn't. He still loved her. It had simply become a different kind of love.

Igneel taught him that energy could not be destroyed, but could transform from one form to another. Perhaps this was it. Love was strength, wasn't it? Then it had to be a sort of energy as well.

But the question was - when and how did he realize?

It all boiled down to one person.

_Gray_.

Since Gray returned to Magnolia, he had been struggling. He wanted to see Gray so much, but at the same time he didn't have the courage.

He wasn't strong or brave enough to face a Gray that had given up on him.

A Gray that wouldn't pull him into a hug, look him in the eye and curse him yet tell him 'I love you' immediately afterward.

So he procrastinated. He knew that Gray would only be here for a few days, a week at most, but he still couldn't bring himself to face him.

He felt horrible.

Every time he woke up without Gray at his right, he was uneasy. Every morning when he didn't see Gray's black toothbrush leaning against his own, he felt uncomfortable. Every time he saw a snow cone, his heart jolted and his head unconsciously swirled around, his eyes searching for the familiar figure, only to be disappointed.

He wondered what the hell was happening to him. He wondered why kissing Lucy didn't take him to heaven and let him avoid his troubles anymore.

He had never noticed the change. Before, he wouldn't even care who slept on his right, if there was even someone. And he certainly wouldn't be aware that Gray wasn't around or had moved his belongings out.

It was different now. Seeing Gray's face in the magazine changed everything. All the emotions he had unknowingly locked up were set free like a broken dam when he saw the man he loved.

The man... He loved.

Yes, he loved Gray.

His timing just sucked. It took Gray leaving for him to realize that fact, and it was too late. Once he acknowledged his feelings, everything began to make sense.

The reason he never let Lucy sleep at his right.

The reason he never took off the ice ring no matter what; and the reason he carefully kept both rings into a small box and carried it around with him despite the inconvenience.

The reason he still told Gray he loved him every day back then even though he was supposedly in love with Lucy and had no need to do so anymore.

The reason he found the idea of breaking up repulsive and a nightmare.

The reason the absence of all of Gray's belongings had no impact on him at first since he was in plain denial.

_He missed Gray so much._

He missed waking up next to him in the morning. Just silently watching the gentle expression and brushing the black hair out of his face, placing a soft kiss on his forehead.

He missed their daily brawls and Gray patching him up afterwards because he couldn't wrap a bandage to save his life.

He missed Gray's warmth. He missed always knowing that he could return to the ironically warm embrace and safe haven.

He missed their special moments by the river bank. In fact, recalling it made his heart wrench painfully in his chest.

He missed his scent. He couldn't really explain it with words, it was just so _Gray_.

He missed kissing him, touching him. Making him laugh.

Most of all, he missed his smile. The smile that he had never had the chance to see ever since.

And that saddened him.

By a twist of fate, the rain had washed one of the sex toys Gray had apparently thrown out to his doorstep. He had hurried out and searched under every bark and leaf, collecting all the toys and placing them back into a cardboard box.

Then he had broken down and laughed like a madman.

Finally, something that had Gray's scent, although faint.

He remembered Gray's every moan and sigh of pleasure when they made love. He wanted to be the only person Gray showed that side of him to. He wanted to be the only one to make Gray let out those sinful sounds.

Oddly, the truth was he never loved Gray before they started dating.

Their intimate relationship allowed him to understand Gray at a completely different level. It wasn't wrong to say that he gradually fell in love with Gray along the way.

Natsu finally understood why he didn't break it off with Gray when he had the chance. It wasn't because Lucy was still in love with Loke. It wasn't because he pitied Gray. The reason was simple, he just couldn't bear to live in a world without Gray as his lover.

No, he hadn't loved Gray before. But somehow, he had become attached to him when they became boyfriends. Little by little, one small step at a time, Natsu fell in love. He was just blinded by the unreciprocated feelings he harbored towards Lucy, and never noticed that he was slowly falling for Gray. There was no mistaking it now.

_Natsu was in love with Gray._

But it was too late.

It was too late, dammit!

Natsu had one shot. And he didn't treasure it.

* * *

"Watch where you're going!"

Natsu stared. His hands began to tremble slightly.

"Na..." A cough. "Natsu?"

Was seeing him so horrible and unexpected?

Natsu could honestly admit that he was scared. Fear. Fear was coursing through his veins. Fear that if he didn't say what he needed to right this moment, he would never get the chance ever again.

He was a cowardly little shit. Once Gray walked away, he would not even try to approach him.

Natsu cleared his throat. "Long time no see, eh?"

His voice came out raspy.

Gray smiled, and Natsu could feel the day turning a hundred times better.

Gray had a nice smile. It wasn't wide like his usual grin, on the contrary it was merely a small curve of the lips.

Did he mention how much he missed Gray's smile?

"Yeah."

One word. Is that all you have to say?

"So... I haven't seen you around."

The beautiful smile disappeared, only to be replaced by a grim, thin line. Gray muttered,"That's because you didn't try."

"..."

Natsu desperately searched for words to say. "So, I guess your missions went okay? You're quite famous now."

_Yeah, this is not awkward at all._

"Lyon helped."

"Ah."

Silence.

Natsu hated this tense air around them. They used to be totally at ease around each other, and look at them now.

"Lyon, eh?"

_Come on, you can't look at each other every day, work together, have each other's backs and trust each other like that without falling in love!_

Why was he remembering the words of that random girl in the streets now?

He couldn't stop himself from asking, "Are you guys dating?"

It was a ridiculous question. Of course they weren't.

Gray cocked his head to the side. "Lyon and I? No way." Natsu didn't miss the tightening of his brow and the way he cast his eyes to the ground. Why did he look so upset?

Silence again. Uncomfortable silence instead of the comfy, relaxed silence they had before.

"Good seeing you, Natsu." Gray turned to leave.

"Gray!"

He turned his head back slightly, asking, "What, Natsu?"

"Call me 'Shitty Flame'."

"Huh?"

"Just do it!"

Gray turned again and began walking away.

"I can't, _Natsu_."

Since when did Gray start saying his name with such spite? And was that a hint of melancholy?

"Why?" The dragon slayer yelled after him.

"No reason." The answer was soft, but Natsu still caught it. He ran after the black-haired teen as fast as he could, and grabbed his wrist, forcing him around.

"Is it because it reminds you of your love for me?"

Gray yanked his hand away. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"You still love me, don't you? There's no way three months would be able to wash away those feelings." Natsu had no clue where the sudden surge of confidence was coming from.

"You're not making sense, Natsu." Gray's head was lowered, his black hair shading his face and at the same time, his expression.

"I'm sorry! I was stupid, I'm so sorry, Gray. I..." Natsu sucked in a deep breath. "I love you." He could feel elation spreading across his chest. How long has it been since he said those words to the person he loved? It made him so happy to say them.

"You don't."

Gray's tone was indifferent.

"Wha... What?" Of all the reactions he expected, this was one he never could have predicted. Outright denial and rejection of his feelings.

"You don't. Do you need me to repeat it again, Natsu?"

Natsu was beginning to dislike the way his name was spoken.

It was different. Gray used to call his name with anger, frustration and impatience, but he could always detect love between the syllables.

He couldn't now. There was no trace of love. There was no trace of _emotion_. It was as if he was uttering the name of a stranger.

And it hurt more than any spiteful words Gray may ever say.

Gray continued, "Don't apologize. There is nothing to forgive."

Natsu bit his lip and spoke up again, his voice shivering ever so minutely. "I miss you."

"I missed you too." _Why did the words not sound right?_

Natsu tried again. "I miss being your boyfriend, Gray."

"I'm sorry, but I don't recall us ever being a couple."

Eyes widening, his heart nearly stopped beating.

_What?_

"Gray..."

"I was just kidding myself back then. We never dated, Natsu. Lucy was right, love isn't the most primary aspect of a romantic relationship. Not when it's one-sided."

And for once in his life, Natsu wished that Lucy wasn't right.

He had no words to say. He wanted to scream that he loved Gray, that he had finally opened his eyes, but all that escaped his mouth was his name.

"Gray...Gray-"

"Stop saying my name as if it means something to you. It's disgusting."

With that final strike, Gray left.

Natsu couldn't feel anything. The world was crumbling around him, the roof collapsing and the earth quaking, but he couldn't feel anything.

He stood up slowly and began walking.

* * *

Gray turned sharply around a corner and leaned his back against the dirty wall, uncaring of the dirt.

He touched the corners of his eyes, and wasn't surprised that his fingers came away moist.

_"I love you."_

Why?

_"Gray."_

Don't call my name.

_"I miss you."_

You don't, you **don't**.

Gray tiredly pushed himself off the wall.

_Shitty Flame, you look horrible. Have you been sleeping well? Eating right?_

_Well, it's not my responsibility anymore nor is it my place to care._

_You have Lucy for that, Shitty Flame._

* * *

**_Gosh, I'm so sorry. The exams are coming up one after another. To everyone who followed, favorited or reviewed, thank you!_**

**_Please forgive me and give me your thoughts. _**

**_-Dreams_**

**Anon replies :**

**RENNICHI : OMG is that true? Here's a tissue haha. Btw, I ship RenIchi too ;)**

**vanessa cruz : Hope the suspense was worth it!**

**SomeRandomAnon : In a way, Natsu would probably have preferred a kick in the balls compared to this.**


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